Friday, June 20, 2014

My Home Birth Experience - Part 1



I did not originally plan on having a home birth. I did know that I wanted to have a natural experience this time. Having had 3 previous births with hospital interventions, I just knew that I didn't want to do it that way again. I researched information on inductions, C-sections, epidurals, etc. It did not take me long to realize how many risks are associated with these things. I had experienced some of these risks already in previous births. With any birth, whether at home or in a hospital, there will always be some possible risks involved. It seems that no matter how much you plan there is really no way to know exactly how things will work out. My birth story is definitely not the story I thought that I would tell. I had something a little different in mind. However, it was the most amazing, wonderful, fulfilling experience I've ever had. Without further ado, my birth story....

Earlier in my pregnancy I called around and looked up doula's in my area. There weren't a ton but I finally found one that I felt comfortable with. As we talked at our appointments about my birth plan and what I wanted out of my hospital birth, I soon saw that I needed to start looking into home birth. I admit that I was quite afraid of even considering it at first because so many people (people who have never researched home births of course) told me how much more dangerous it was than being in a hospital. I also had those who told me their birth horror stories and said that had they been at home something horrible would've happened. Unfortunately, I came to find out that a big reason there are birth horror stories are because of the interventions that hospitals use all too freely. I know that home birth isn't for everyone. However, I personally no longer believe that being induced should be practiced so regularly. Low risk women don't need to be afraid to birth at home. Women have been doing this for hundreds of years and here's a little secret...Our bodies know exactly what to do!

Well, lucky for me I found out that my doula worked as a team with an experienced midwife and that she was also a midwife's apprentice. I just decided to go for it and release my fear. I asked tons of questions and read as much as I could. This helped ease the fear of the unknown.
I really loved the personal relationship that developed over time with these ladies. It is so hard to get to know a doctor due to how quickly you are rushed through your appointments. I loved that my appointments were over an hour to give time to really ask questions and get to know each other. I ended up feeling like they were family by the time the end of pregnancy got there.

I'm not going to lie, this pregnancy was hellish for me. I gained more weight than I wanted, had skin issues that required treatment, was stressed due to outside circumstances and became overly emotional. It was certainly not what I expected but I dealt with things as they came.

As I neared the end of pregnancy my baby boy seemed like he might be a little larger than the average but nothing really indicated he would be overly large. I had 2 eight pound babies in the past so I was no stranger to a larger baby. My belly started feeling much heavier than I had experienced in previous pregnancies. As I passed my due date I started to get a little concerned that he was going to be too big for me to push out naturally. Why did I think this? Because I've heard time and time again about how people have to be induced early because the baby is "too big" for their body. Again, I tried to release that fear and keep going. I tried everything I could to naturally get labor going at home. Walks, sex, bouncing on the yoga ball, walking up and down stairs were just a few things I tried. I was willing to let the baby bake the way he needed but if my body was ready then I was surely going to help to throw it over the edge!

At 6 days overdue I was really feeling fat and miserable and could barely get around. I was starting to think I'd be pregnant forever! I was feeling stressed with all the comments from people about how I should've had the baby already. I thought for some reason that it was my fault I wasn't going into labor. I felt like my body was broken and lost all confidence at the end.
 
This particular day I told my midwife how I was feeling. She told me that I needed to just believe in myself and that I can do this.  I felt comforted by the things she said to help gain my confidence back.
 
I finally decided to give up and leave it in God's hands.  I prayed, meditated, and just convinced myself that it was okay. I felt my confidence come back and knew that baby would come when he was ready. I knew that no matter what everything would be okay.
 
I decided to just go outside with my husband and kids and just have fun with them. It was a beautiful, sunny, warm day.  I picked strawberries, watched my 2 year old fish in our pond with my husband, did some gardening and then I did the ultimate; a ride on our four wheeler (don't ask me what on earth made me do that!)
I had SO much fun!! I forgot how stressed I was earlier that day.
 
I'm sure you can guess what happened later that night.
Around 10:30 pm I started having contractions which were much like the Braxton Hicks (practice contractions) I had been having for weeks so I didn't think much of it.
 
Then around 11:30 pm I noticed a slight pattern to them but I still didn't get too excited because that had happened a couple times as well. I wasn't convinced and also did not want to get excited and then stressed again if it was not the real deal
 
I finally just went to bed. I woke up at 1:30 am with a powerful contraction.  This contraction was enough to make me say "Oh! Well, THAT was different!"
At this point the contractions were about 15 minutes apart so I was able to sleep between them. As time went on they just kept getting closer and closer. I finally woke my husband when they were 5 minutes apart.  He said I shouldn't have woke him up yet because I had "a long way to go". He also didn't think I should bother the midwife just yet since it was the middle of the night. Not sure why, but I listened to him. I think the 'no confidence' factor came in to play again. I kept telling him that she said to call when they were FIFTEEN minutes apart since this was baby #4 and she was over an hour away. He ended up falling back asleep.
 
I walked around a lot and watched television while standing and rocking back and forth. I took a shower. I was really hungry so I had a cheese stick and some applesauce.  It was so nice to be able to do whatever I wanted while I was in labor! No more annoying hospital ice chips! No monitors and IV's everywhere! It was such a breath of fresh air.

By 5 am the contractions were 2 minutes apart and I really needed to breathe through them and concentrate.
My husband was still sleeping and I knew he didn't believe it was really going to happen because I had so many false alarms in the past so I just decided to call the midwife without waking him. She asked me if these contractions felt different than the ones I had been having previously. I said "For sure!". She said "We're on our way then!" She told me later that she knew it was the real deal just by the sound of my voice.
 
I woke hubby again and at that point I was moaning loudly through contractions so he knew I meant business. The only thing that felt comfortable was standing and rocking. Sitting was horrid.  Laying was unbearable.
 
Hubby started to get the bed ready and started setting up the birthing pool but I quickly realized I wouldn't be needing it since everything was going really fast. The contractions were one on top of the other. I felt nauseated and I was shaking. I told hubby to call and find out how soon my midwife would be there. He said 30 minutes! I knew from my reading that I was in transition because of the nausea and shaking. I knew it would be sooner than 30 minutes. It's really true that when you're at the point where you think you can't stand it anymore then you're almost done.
 
My body just started pushing on its own.  I couldn't control it even though I wanted to because my midwives weren't there yet! I finally laid down on my side on the bed moaning and grunting with each push.

My 12 year old daughter must've heard me because she came in the room. I had not planned on my kids being present for the birth but it just ended up working out that way. I'm not sure when my 10 year old son came in but he was there too.
 
My midwives finally arrived and I felt so relieved by that! I had already been pushing for a few minutes but she started helping my body by using counter pressure with some olive oil.  I was still on my side but they needed to hold my legs for me because I felt weak. I kept pushing and could feel his head out but the rest wouldn't budge. I was feeling a little frustrated. All of a sudden she very firmly said "you need to get on your hands & knees now!" I could not do this on my own. I was so tired! I just felt a bunch of hands flip me. These women are strong! My husband helped as well.
 
My kids were in there watching mom in her most primal state. I remember thinking "I hope they aren't scared, I hope they aren't going to be traumatized since I didn't prepare them for this". 
 
Once I was on my hands and knees I felt her reach her hand in to get him out. He was stuck!
Turning onto my hands and knees helped to open up the pelvis more. All of this happened so fast that I really didn't know what was going on. I just knew he wasn't coming out with my really hard pushes.
 
Later I found out that this really can be a potentially dangerous situation and thank goodness she had the training she had! She is such a powerful, smart, intuitive woman. She saved my baby's life!

I had my husband and 2 comforting, kind ladies taking care of me. I was given water as I labored. Gentle words were spoken. I knew everyone in that room and I was not afraid at all. I felt so loved!
 
After the birth was over I thought about how things may have gone had I been in a hospital bed with an epidural and on my back. How many interventions would have taken place to get the baby out? I certainly would not have been able to get on my hands and knees if my legs were numb. C-section? Episiotomy? Rips and tears to my perineum? Who knows!

I did have a very, very tiny superficial tear that did not require stitches. I couldn't believe it!
 
Finally, Noah made his healthy 10 lb 11oz entrance into the world at 7:16 am.  We had already picked his name out and felt strongly that he was a little "Noah". It turns out that he was not so little! 

My water never broke so he was born inside of his water sac. Isn't that kind of cool that a little boy named Noah was born along with all of his water behind him? Maybe he was hoping to have an arc built in time for labor and that's what kept him so long? Silly boy.
 
He is a wonderfully healthy, fat baby boy. Thanks to the skill of my midwives, help of my husband and the awesome power of my body, I had the home birth that I desired. I would not change a thing. I loved every minute.
 
Especially the minutes that did not involve contractions. ;)

2 comments:

  1. I absolutely love this story! If Justin and I have another I really want to look more into a home birth! Austin was almost a home birth I wish would've just stayed home.... Thank you for sharing this beautiful experience with the world! He is gorgeous! Can't wait to meet and hold him in September!

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  2. This is Awesome. I had a midwife for Hamilton. He was a 10 pounder too. And I agree with you. It is a shame that we let ourselves be so drawn away from what we know is right because we think we can't do what God already made us able to do. Thank you for sharing, and I am sure your kids are okay, they wont remember the gory details, just the immense bonding which I am sure was a spiritual experience for your whole family!

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